The XFL is off this week so the USFL will run unopposed this weekend as The Rock prepares for his championship game. But never mind that shit, the Birmingham Stallions are being relocated to Dallas! At least that's what people think will happen after FOX filed trademarks for the other old USFL teams and two original teams. One of those teams is the Dallas Stallions, which was a roller hockey team in the defunct Roller Hockey International during the 90s. They're also a cricket team in Dallas Premier League. The other was the Austin Wranglers which was a Arena Football League team. They're likely to be the relocation spot for the Arizona Wranglers.
Of course, the USFL is covering their ass by saying that they made up these teams for "legal housekeeping to protect old IPs". I call bullshit. They already replaced the Tampa Bay Bandits for the Memphis Showboats so relocating more teams wouldn't be surprising. What WOULD be surprising is relocating the Stallions after Birminghamians supported the team (and league) last season. Plus, them and Memphians are the only people to care about the USFL this season. They're not pulling St. Louis Battlehawks crowds but at least they're actually showing up.
And where the hell would this Dallas Football Team play anyway? In Arlington? With the XFL's Arlington Renegades? What, they're moving into the Cotton Bowl? How they gonna play in a 92,100 capacity stadium when they have so few attendance, the USFL doesn't bother to release it? Or maybe they can play at a local high school or college stadium since Texas has so many of them. What better way to grow your league than piss off the diehards. How Nascar of them.
THE GAMES
Houston Gamblers 24
Philadelphia Stars 21
FOX is absolutely using fake crowd noise for their games. There couldn't have been 1,000 people there yet the audio was buzzing with fans. Anyways, the Gamblers were even with the Showboats for half of the game then puled away in the 2nd half. Only for Memphis to make a late comeback to take the lead with 1:54 left. Houston then drove down the field to take back the lead with 13 seconds left thanks to blown coverage by the Showboats. The Stars don't look as good as they was last season so I'll pick Houston to edge out another win over a even foe.
Memphis Showboats 10
Michigan Panthers 27
Even though the Panthers lost, it's still amazing what a change in coaching can do for a team. They was a laughing stock with bad QBs and even worse coaching. Now here they are tied with the team they lost to on top of the North division at 2-1. BTW, the empty seats and tarping don't look as noticeable at Ford Field since they can turn the lights off inside the dome.
New Orleans Breakers 33
New Jersey Generals 28
The Breakers won a shootout against the defending champs last week. It's amazing what you can do when your QB doesn't constantly throw INTs. I'm gonna ride this air attack and pick them to win again. With that said, they can't afford to continue playing lackluster defense like that.
Birmingham Stallions 25
Pittsburgh Maulers 22
The Maulers is another sad sack team that hope they won't suck again. Stars QB Case Cookus turned the ball over 3 times yet the Maulers only won by 1 score. A win is a win but I don't see Birmingham letting them slide like that. In other news, I just found out Chris Blewit is kicking for Pittsburgh. In his debut, he tied a USFL record for most made field goals in a game going 5-5. I haven't heard of him since 2021 where I questioned why the Washington Football Team would sign a kicker with a ironic name. He didn't have a profile picture then in the NFL and he still doesn't 2 years later in the USFL. Does he not like taking pictures or the leagues don't care?!?
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| At least he has a headshot on the NFL's website as a free agent now. |
LAST WEEK: 1-3
OVERALL: 7-5
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