Thursday, December 8, 2022

Who Will Win The NFC South? NFL Week 14 Preview

NFC South mascot on Jeopardy set.


Like with the 2020 season, I will breakdown the NFC South and decide who's more likely to win this trash division. Thankfully, it isn't as dire as the NFC Least was where 2 crap teams got on primetime because it decided the division champ, so the South rep SHOULD finish over .500.

NFC South standings

The Buccos are 6-6 with their MNF win over the Aints and are just as likely to finish 11-6 as they are to go 6-11. Since they have a 2 game lead and a starting QB who's actually worth a shit, they should cross the 9 win threshold. How'll they do in the playoffs? That's another story.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers remaining schedule.

The Falcons are on a bye week so they will have to win the rest of their games and hope Tampa Bay shit the bed for them to attain the NFC South crown. It's unlikely but there's still a chance!

Atlanta Falcons remaining schedule.

Even if the Panthers somehow won the rest of their games, they're not winning this division. They would be better off tanking the rest of the season and figure out who the hell is gonna be their starting QB next season since they dumped Baker Mayfield and the collection of Sam Darnold, XFL Legend PJ Walker and Matt Corral are not viable long term starters. Maybe they should throw rookie Davis Cheek in there and see what he can do. He can't do any worse.

Carolina Panthers remaining schedule.

The Aints lived up to their name and choked away a late lead. They already have 9 losses going into their bye week so you can pretty much eliminate them from playoff contention. Now how is Andy Dalton a better QB than Jameis Winston again? Cause he hasn't done jack to warrant the dick riding he gets from the media. At least Jameis gives you big plays along with Taysom Hill!

New Orleans Saints remaining schedule.

THE GAMES


2022 NFL season week 14 Las Vegas Raiders vs Los Angeles Rams
Las Vegas Raiders   17
Los Angeles Rams   23

With Matthew Stafford likely out for the year with a spinal cord contusion. Backup QB John Wolford has his own neck issues. And they're not too keen on having Bryce Perkins or Case Cookus start despite their 3-9 record. Why the hell not sign Baker Mayfield? If Stafford's recent rash of injuries ends his career, they can try to revitalize Baker's career like with Matt's.


2022 NFL season week 14 New York Jets vs Buffalo Bills
New York Jets  23
Buffalo Bills     20

The Bills got such a dominant win on TNF, people are saying the Patriots' "Era of Greatness" is dead (It died when Brady left). Unfortunately for them Von Miller got ACL surgery and is done.


2022 NFL season week 14 Cleveland Browns vs Cincinnati Bengals
Cleveland Browns      9
Cincinnati Bengals   20

Deshaun Watson didn't do much in his return to Houston so it's a good thing the Browns' defense carried them to that win. They won't be so lucky against the Chiefs' kryptonite.


2022 NFL season week 14 Houston Texans vs Dallas Cowboys
Houston Texans   20
Dallas Cowboys   31

Speaking of the Texans, if they wasn't complete ass, this would be a actual rivalry. At least the prediction machine doesn't say they will get obliterated by Dem Boys like the Colts was on SNF. Probably because OBJ won't be joining the Cowboys any time soon due to health concerns.


2022 NFL season week 14 Minnesota Vikings vs Detroit Lions
Minnesota Vikings   24
Detroit Lions            23

Vikings rookie coach Kevin O'Connell credits empowering players for this season's successes. Having a coach who actually believes in you can build confidence in a QB where he's willing to play more freely because he's not worried about getting benched if he makes a mistake, see Miami/Tua. I don't feel they're winning the Super Bowl but they should win a playoff game.


2022 NFL season week 14 Philadelphia Eagles vs New York Giants.
Philadelphia Eagles   20
New York Giants        10

Sudden death OT > Current NFL OT So for now on, I'm posting this Conan clip after ties.



2022 NFL season week 14 Baltimore Ravens vs Pittsburgh Steelers
Baltimore Ravens     13
Pittsburgh Steelers  10

While the Steelers are trying their best to continue Mike Tomlin's streak of non losing seasons, the Ravens will likely be without Lamar Jackson due to a knee sprain. Good thing they have Tyler Huntley and his 1-3 record as starter to fill in! They better hope Lamar returns next week.


2022 NFL season week 14 Jacksonville Jaguars vs Tennessee Titans
Jacksonville Jaguars   27
Tennessee Titans          6

It's not often you see a GM of a winning team get fired during the season but that's what happened to Jon Robinson. Former Titan AJ Brown literally got Jon fired when he balled out in the Eagles convincing win over his old squad. Maybe the clown show Jaguars should hire him. Especially since they got blown out by the goddamn LIONS of all teams!


2022 NFL season week 14 Kansas City Chiefs vs Denver Broncos
Kansas City Chiefs   34
Denver Broncos        20

Too bad Deion Sanders didn't come here to fix this trash ass Coloradoan team. Maybe in a couple years when his son is draft eligible, they'll bring in both of them and kick out the scrubs.


2022 NFL season week 14 Carolina Panthers vs Seattle Seahawks
Carolina Panthers    24
Seattle Seahawks    14

The Panthers could also use Prime's services (or Jim Harbaugh's) because Steve Wilks isn't doing much to prove the Cardinals were wrong for firing him after a single season. Granted, Carolina doesn't have a legitimate starting QB and they traded away their best player so this team was bound to suck anyway. But still, no one's clamoring for him to stay as head coach. 


2022 NFL season week 14 Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs San Francisco 49ers
Tompa Bay Buccaneers   28
San Francisco 49ers        17

Just when Jimmy G was in the groove leading the Niners into the playoffs, he breaks his foot. Do they sign Baker Mayfield as a replacement? NOPE. They're sticking with Mr. Irrelevant Brock Purdy. The list of guys picked last in the NFL Draft is full of bums with only a few successes like Super Bowl winner Ryan Succop and Grey Cup winner Chad Kelly. But Brock did a nice job in relief so let's see how Big Cock Brock do against TB who barely beat the Saints.


2022 NFL season week 14 Miami Dolphins vs Los Angeles Chargers
Miami Dolphins              14
Los Angeles Chargers  17

Tua went from being unwanted by his old coach to leading vote getter for the Pro Bowl Games. That's quite the come up for someone who people felt should've retired after his "back" injury.


2022 NFL season week 14 New England Patriots vs Arizona Cardinals
New England Patriots   7
Arizona Cardinals        21

The Cardinals are not gonna make it a 3-peat of hosting teams playing in the Super Bowl.


LAST WEEK     6-8-1
OVERALL     101-92-2

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