Soccer fans love to bitch about our use of football for this sport. They
call it handegg completely ignoring that our football looks nothing like a
egg (it's oblong), we have kickers/punters who do kick the ball and our
sport evolved from their precious flopball. Last Sunday is a prime example
why a lot of fans want to remove kicking from football altogether.
Five straight missed field goals by Mason Crosby and Evan McPherson before
Crosby finally kicked the game winner in overtime. I'm sure this was a
anomaly and they will get back to their accurate ways by goddamn that was
brutal to watch. I kept screaming
at the TV for them to go for it on forth down but nope, they kept kicking
and missing. It probably was
the wind messing with the
kicks so I don't fault them with that. Still, I wouldn't send my kicker out
that many times when I could go for the TD instead. Also, coaches who punt
in enemy territory are cowards.
THE GAMES
Tompa Bay Buccaneers 24
Philadelphia Eagles 17
These Buccos made some news this week. Tom Brady
injured his thumb. Brady called Antonio Brown a "football genius". Snoop Dogg brought
strippers
for TB12's son at his birthday party after Super Bowl LIII. The Bucs
removed
Jon Gruden from their Ring Of Honor (for now). Leonard Fournette
is hyped
about this team. And Gronk (among others) will miss another game due to his rib injury. Tampa Bay should still
come away with a win here.
Miami Dolphins 52
Jacksonville Jaguars 14
Man, Jon Gruden may have saved Urban Meyer's job. Things have deteriorated
so much between Urban and the Jags, he was at risk of getting fired by
their bye week. But now that everyone is focused on Gruden's leaked
emails, Urban can slink into the background as this team continues to be
mismanaged. Maybe Tony Khan should focus more on them instead of
shit talking
Vinnie Mac. As for Cayman Nebraska, if she
does get fired
from her job, maybe she should start a OnlyFans account. It's a easy way
to get suckers to pay for IG quality content.
Kansas City Chiefs 33
Washington Warriors 23
Speaking of distractions, people completely forgot those emails were from
the investigation
of WFT owner Dan Snyder and the toxic workplace environment of the
organization. It even led to a DEA raid
of WFT athletic trainer Ryan Vermillion's office at the practice facility
over prescription drug distribution earlier this month. So surprise
surprise, they will retired Sean Taylor's number (on short notice) during
this game. Unsurprisingly, people are
suspicious of their motive to
doing something many fans felt they should've did after he was
killed in 2007.
Unless the NFLPA
gets their way, we won't know what was in those 650,000 emails.
LA Rams 48
NY Giants 10
The Giants took some heavy losses in their
last game, chief among them Saquon Barkley's
ankle sprain. Daniel Jones suffered a concussion but it looks likely he will return
for this game. I don't consider Jones a star player but I wouldn't put him
out there in a
lost cause. Start Mike (Still In The League) Glennon, let him and Saquon heal up and come back for
Week 7.
Houston Texans 24
Indianapolis Colts 27
While Clay Travis brings up
Deshaun Watson in his response to Gruden leaving the Raiders, Colts owner Jim
Irsay says the Colts will win
2 Super Bowls in
10 years. LOL not with
that roster! In
uplifting news, it was great to see T.Y. Hilton recover from his neck
injury. He
considered retiring
but after talking with Andrew Luck, he decided to get back in the game.
Good for him!
Cincinnati Bungles 35
Detroit Lions 31
How the hell Joe Burrow injure his throat? He was released from the
hospital after being cleared of a throat contusion and is on "voice rest" but WHAT THE HELL! I can't blame the Bengals for that
corkscrew hit he
took. He needs to protect himself because he's not built like Cam Newton
or Ben Roethlisberger where he can absorb punishment. Nor is he Lamar
Jackson or Patrick Mahomes where he can outrun defenders. Like Aaron
Rodgers said,
just slide.
Green Bay Packers 30
Chicago Bears 17
Los Angeles Chargers 44
Baltimore Ravens 30
Speaking of Lamar Jackson, he was
happy
he got his first roughing the passer penalty in 2 years. The simulation
says he won't comeback to win
this game
but you shouldn't
count him out.
Minnesota Vikings 30
Carolina Panthers 29
Panthers not looking too dominant like they were earlier this season. They
still have a
strong defense
but their offense has been lacking as of late. The Vikings are middle of
the road on both sides of the ball so this is bound to be another nail
biter that makes the
opposing coach cry.
Arizona Cardinals 42
Cleveland Browns 21
Statwise, the Cardinals met their match. Realistically, not so much. The Browns
have the offense to shock the world so I wouldn't rule out the simulation
being wrong about the Brownies. It would've been interesting seeing newly
traded Zach Ertz play for the Cardinals after the Eagles loss but that's
not allowed. Now him and J.J. Watt are
teammates
just like their wives.
Las Vegas Raiders 16
Denver Broncos 34
Gruden would've gotten away with it if it wasn't for those meddling New
York Times. Of all the coaches
to be outed
for saying racist, misogynistic and homophobic things, he's the least
surprising. Chucky is a noted asshole so saying "Dumboriss Smith has lips
the size of michellin tires", calling Roger Goodell a "faggot" and a
"clueless anti football pussy", bitching about female refs, "queers" in
football and players kneeling during the anthem and trading topless
cheerleader pics sounds par for the course. Various people have cut off
contact with him, including Madden who will give Gruden the
Aaron Hernandez treatment
and
remove him
from the game. Assistant coach Rich Bisaccia
takes over so who knows how this season will end.
EA puffed out their chest about removing Gruden but they're too lazy to add Bisaccia or assistants in general. |
As for who leaked the emails, that's a bigger question. The NFL says they
didn't even though they
benefited
from it. The NFLPA was in the middle of voting for their new leader. But
when the emails leaked, DeMaurice Smith was reelected for another term.
The union has been Charmin soft under him so the NFL will enjoy continuing
to negotiate with someone who won't put up much of a fight and ask for
something like fully
guaranteed contracts, tuition or lifetime
health insurance for former players. Some even believe that Gruden was
sacrificed
so people wouldn't ask about the WFT investigation. But the leak might
come back to bite the NFL in the ass when it comes to the
lawsuit
they're facing from St. Louis. Remember that? They won't be able to
control the narrative like they did with Gruden and Snyder so they would
be fucked if that case goes to court. And it doesn't help that their
lawyer Jeff Pash is
roped in this
as well. But the NFL says there are no more
problematic emails so let's leave it at that (HAHAHAHA).
Dallas Cowboys 34
New England Patriots 38
Here's a couple
fun facts. This is the first time the Cowboys played the Patriots with a better
record than them since
Week 3
of the 1981 season where they won 35-21. Also, the Patriots won 6 straight
games against the Cowboys with their last loss coming in
Week 16
in 1996 losing 6-12. These teams trade
advantages and disadvantages
on their offenses and defenses so go with Bill Belichick to pull a rabbit
out of his hat to salvage this season.
Seattle Seahawks 6
Pittsburgh Steelers 14
It's Geno Smith's
time to shine
while Russell Wilson is out with a busted finger. He had a cushy job for
the past 3 years as Russ' backup but now he will get the chance to start
in his first game in 4 years. He was
one of many Jets QBs who couldn't get them back to the respectability of the
Sanchize era. He was average at best with them and
lost his job
to Ryan Fitzpatrick when IK Enemkpali
punched him, breaking his jaw, due to
stiffing him
of $600. He looked decent when he came in
last week but couldn't get the comeback against the Rams. ESPN did a story
last year
about the fight revealing that Enemkpali got into
real estate. I know it won't happen since he's
enjoying his life
but it would be funny if the Steelers flew in Ikemefuna to fuck with
Geno.
Buffalo Bills 31
Tennessee Titans 21
I should've known once they added ESPN to the playoff and Super Bowl
rotation, it would give them a excuse to put a
playoff game
on Monday Night Football for the next 5 years. Sure, the game will also be
available on ABC and Yahoo Sports app but I still hate it. The NFL is the
only sports league where every week of the regular season and playoff game
is on network television. But these assholes at ESPN is trying to change
that and force people to watch their shitty network. I can't wait till
they give Amazon and NFL Network a game as well. Ugh.
LAST WEEK 8-8
OVERALL 44-36
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